Is Grief So Bad?
Well, not according to George A. Bonanno whose book, titled “The Other Side of Sadness: What the New Science of Bereavement Tells Us About Life After Loss,” challenges traditional assumptions regarding how we can healthily deal with death and cope with losing loved ones.
According to a recent review of the book, Bonanno, a clinical psychologist and chairman of the counseling and clinical psychology department at Teachers College at Columbia University, says that while some people do experience deep, long-term depression and grief as a result of loss, most people eventually find balance and contentment.
“Most bereaved people get better on their own, without any kind of professional help,” Bonanno writes. “They may be deeply saddened, they may feel adrift for some time, but their life eventually finds its way again, often more easily than they thought possible. This is the nature of grief. This is human nature.”
In effect, Bonanno challenges the varied assumptions concerning loss and bereavement — that everyone needs grief counseling or therapy, or the idea that just because someone can smile or joke in the face of death doesn’t mean he or she is in denial.
It would seem that most people are unknowingly strong and resilient — that in order to move past one’s grief, after paying respect to or honoring a lost loved one, the biggest thing one needs is simply time.
Read more on grief and how it affects children in the Valley of Life Guide To Children and Grief.
Tags: book review, George Bonanno, grief book, The Other Side of Sadness
